There are chores I hate doing and there are chores I don’t mind doing.
Dishes is one of those chores I don’t mind doing.
I actually love doing dishes and this is nothing to do with my family protocols growing up. And the reason I don’t mind doing dishes is because I hate when dirty dishes just pile up on the bench. The messy look, the gross build up of grease and grime, the nasty and filthy smell of rotting leftovers, and the overwhelming feeling that there are so many stacked up dishes to do be done.
This is probably why I do dishes straight away and keep short accounts with the dishes; so they don’t get to this point.
Another things I keep short accounts with is my relationships.
Whenever issues, conflicts and concerns occur; I sort them, I rinse them, I scrub them, I clean them and I dry them – I begin a process to resolve the issue, conflict and concern.
Without keeping short accounts with relationships, they become like dirty dishes sitting there, stacking up high and piling in fast; where grime, grease and filth begins to build getting pretty gross, messy and nasty. And the feeling to resolve built up issues, conflicts and concerns; starts to gets overwhelming and you begin to ask how did all this happen?
This is probably why I resolve issues, conflicts and concerns and keep short accounts with my relationships; so they don’t get to that point.
I find that having short accounts with people starts with checking in with each other, asking questions like:
Hey how did you feel about what happened?
What do you think needs to be addressed from this situation?
What is something helpful from what happened that we can take away?
But also for others to have short accounts with me; I need them to confront me about things I have done.
When I have short accounts with loved ones, I feel a sense of relief. A sense of relief where my relationships begin to have no record of wrong – just experiences we have learnt to understand, be aware and built trust in each other.
Maybe when we start to have short accounts with all people around us, we could experience this sense of relief too.
Just like the feeling when you finish doing the dishes.